The Christmas season

So here it is, the Christmas season, a time of stress and anguish for many...only I'm not feeling stressed and anguished! I must be forgetting something! Actually I stress in November, like the day after Thanksgiving - aaaagh, I have to get my Christmas cards done, aaaaaagh, I'm not done with my shopping, aaaagh, the house isn't decorated... I think you get the picture. I've always been weird this way, needing to get things done way ahead so that when the actual event happens, I'm not stressed. So I guess I stress about stress or something haha!

So here it is 2 weeks before Christmas, my shopping is done, the gifts that have arrived (I like to shop on-line and avoid those stressful lines) are wrapped, I've made goodies (aaaaaagh, I have to get them delivered NOW!!) and I'm kind of bored. How odd is that!!

In case I sound like I'm bragging because I'm done, or in case I sound like I'm organized, I'M NOT!! I'm just...weird. And if you don't believe me...I'm already working on crafts for VBS next June! Who does that??

A wonderful Thanksgiving

I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving - I know I did. We went to Wichita to spend it with my husband's family. Some of them live in the KC area, some live in the Wichita area, everyone was there at my mother-in-law's house...except one poor brother-in-law who just had hip replacement surgery and stayed home.

I love my husband's family, but I have to admit I didn't always appreciate them. I grew up on the mission field where the closest thing we had to family was another missionary family, and they lived a long ways away. So when we moved to Wichita a year after we were married (the whole family lived there then), what with everybody going to the same small church, getting together for birthdays and holidays, it seemed a bit too...much. Sometimes. Even though I really liked them and had a great time with them. They were wonderful people, but I just wasn't used to it. And I was young and stupid. Then people started moving away - first a brother and his wife, then a sister and her husband, then a niece...and I realized how much I missed them and had taken the whole family togetherness thing for granted. Then we moved away and there were no more birthday celebrations with family, only holiday celebrations, so we didn't see each other for months at a time. And I came to realize just how stupid I had been.

I'm thankful my eyes were opened (or maybe I just grew up), and I'm incredibly thankful for this family. They are not my husband's family, they are my family, and I'm proud to be a part of it. We may not always agree on everything, we all have our quirks (me more than anyone!), but we love each other. Because that's what family does.

A visit from my Momma

I haven't written on here for awhile because I had a very important visitor for 2 weeks - my momma :) What a great time we had! I have to tell you about my mom. She is one of the kindest and wisest ladies I know, although she would (and does) say that she is far from that. But this is MY blog, so my opinion is the one that counts here... She is also one of the strongest women I know, not necessarily physically (although she is that too for the most part) but mentally and spiritually. My dad was a quadriplegic for about the last decade of his life, and Mom took amazing care of him. I think it would be safe to say that she kept him alive and fairly well all those years until he went to be with the Lord 11 months ago. The care and devotion she showed him taught me lessons I will never ever forget.

So...our visit. She's been in the area before and seen the Garden of Eden, so we skipped that. She THOUGHT she'd been to the Big Ball of Twine, but she's never seen it the way I showed it to her HAHA! Sad to say, the painting of the Statue of Liberty holding a ball of twine has broken in half and is falling out of the window, but she still got a big kick out of it and all the other paintings. AND we took her to the Home on the Range cabin which she really enjoyed. We also stopped in Portis to show her that the animator for Porky Pig was from there. Other than that, we scrapbooked (she does such a beautiful job so I let her do banquet pictures for me!), we gardened, we sat by the pond, we talked. And talked some more. She is working on a book about my dad's life, so we also worked on editing the chapters she has already written. Did I mention that she is an amazing woman? She also got a chance to spend lots of time with my kids which they all enjoyed.

One of the pages Mom scrapbooked for me

In Portis, home of the animator for Porky Pig - you can't see it very well, but on the right side of the top piece is a picture of Porky Pig

My beautiful Mom, me, and my beautiful daughter

The Dutch Windmill in Smith Center
Home on the Range Cabin

The only bad time in our visit came the night before she was supposed to leave. We'd taken her to Wichita Friday night because she had a very early flight Saturday morning. Well, she took quite a tumble in the hotel that night and ended up in the ER getting her chin glued back together. She also hit her head pretty hard. So she and I ended up spending almost 3 extra days together until she felt up to flying out. It was quality time, but I'm not sure the price was worth it! Poor Mom is still suffering from the bruises and bumps and her aching chin. I wanted to send her back all rested and relaxed! Well, she rested all right, but it's hard to be relaxed when everything hurts!

So now she's gone, and I can't wait til she comes back! Love you Mom!!

The Scottish Festival

My family and I went to the Scottish Festival in McPherson today. We went last year for the first time and really enjoyed it. We all have different things we enjoy--Joey LOVES the sword and knife booth (picture in a moment!), Sarah enjoys the Blackheart Fencing Club, Zach enjoys the different Scottish and Irish dances (especially the hardshoe jigs today), my husband likes the sheepdog demonstrations, and I REALLY enjoy the 'tossing of the caber' and the bagpipes. The Massed Pipe Bands are amazing, and when they all play Amazing Grace at once my heart feels incredibly full! Last year was the first time I heard bagpipes live, and I was enthralled. It was also the first time I saw men in kilts! I also love the way the drummers twirl their fleece-covered drumstick 'thingies'--seems like quite a talent! Watching the men in the Athletic competitions is fun, but there is just something wrong with 500 pound women in kilts flinging large metal balls around...

Here are some pictures for your viewing pleasure:

Joey's purchase - where were his parents?? The cell phone is there so you can see the size of that knifey thing!

My purchase! Santa in full Scottish kit playing the bagpipes

Zach bought a jacket...looks quite dashing with his shorts! He is sitting in the trolley that takes everyone back and forth from the Festival to parking

The Blackheart Fencing Club

Outside the Scottish Festival - I liked the bridge!

My Dream

A friend asked me the other day what I dreamed of before I became a pastor's wife. Hm, good question. As a kid, I wanted to be a scientist, then a doctor, then a cowgirl. Apparently I lowered my sights over the years!

At first I couldn't remember having any dreams as I got older, then I remembered that I really wanted to be a mom; since I have 4 kids, I guess I achieved that one! Once I became a mom and a pastor's wife, I started dreaming about becoming an author. My mom, bless her heart, must have had an inkling, because she kept every email I sent her over the years and later sent them all back to me since they told about our lives here in the middle of nowhere.

Then I started writing articles about my kids for a column in our paper called Village Voices. The paper wanted to add my picture to it, but something my dad always said came to mind--Fools' names and fools' faces often appear in public places! So I decided I better not! I had quite a following of little old ladies in town who told me I brought back memories of when their kids were little. This was all a few years back, and some of those ladies still come up to me and tell me they miss that column! Many of the articles were about my youngest, Joey; since he couldn't read yet there was no danger of him finding out what I wrote about him unless one of his siblings told on me! He was a wild little fellow, all boy, and always out to get himself killed. We were in the park one day, and he was doing something dangerous (as usual), and I yelled, "JOEY!" A lady came up to me and said, "Is that THE Joey?" I had to laugh because I didn't even know her.

Anyway, back to the author dream. I decided to start on a book using those old emails and columns; I even had a couple of titles: Living Life in the Middle of Nowhere, or maybe Diary of an Insane Pastor's Wife. Wait, that sounds like the pastor is insane... Anyway, then I started thinking about what Dad said...and then I figured if I wrote a book it would probably end up on a shelf in the Dollar Tree...and then I put it away. Someday I'll take that file with half a book in it, blow the dust off it, finish it up, print a few copies...and give them to those sweet little white-haired ladies who cheered me on, should they still be alive. I even have the perfect cover picture for it:

Some day!

Boys and Girls

I've decided if nothing exciting is happening in the present I'll revisit the past, and now that I'm babysitting a little girl, I'm remembering how different my little boys and girls were from each other even as little bitty kids. I was looking through some things and found this conversation from when my oldest daughter and son were 5 and 3:

Daughter: Let's pretend we're in love.
Son: Yeah, and let's pretend we fight.
Daughter: And let's pretend we want to get married.
Son: Yeah, and let's pretend I have a sword and spear.
Daughter: And let's pretend you say you love me.
Son: Yeah, and let's pretend I knock your head off with my slingshot.
Daughter: And let's pretend I'm a beautiful princess.
Son: Yeah, and let's pretend my RC car came alive and ran over a boy and Sherriff Woody came along and arrested RC and took him to jail and RC got out and ran over Sherriff Woody and took his head off.
Daughter: And let's pretend that we couldn't get married because you're not a prince, and a princess can only marry a prince so we can't get married after all, and I have to go find a prince...

Don't tell me God didn't make boys and girls differently :)

Touching Base with God

I had a revelation this evening. It came to me as I sat staring at the phone, waiting for Oldest Daughter to call. I planned to call her earlier this evening, but then she told me, via IM, that The Boyfriend had called and she would call later. So I sat here and waited. And waited. And continued to wait. It is now bedtime and I am still waiting.

Which led to my revelation. So many times I get busy and forget to touch base with God. I plan to, I really do, but then something comes up, something draws my attention away, sometimes seems really important and has to be done just then. And God waits. And waits. And continues to wait. Because He's my Father and He loves me and wants to hear from me.

So, I guess I'm thankful for this waiting period because it has opened my eyes. I'm so thankful God doesn't give up on me. But I'm giving up on my daughter. For now. I'm going to bed!

Wait, she is calling... !!

My usual sleeplessness

I'm sitting here mad at my husband. Not because he did anything, but because he is asleep. He turns off the light...he starts snoring. How does he do that??? Meanwhile I toss and turn, toss and turn, toss and turn, get up and wander around, stare at facebook for awhile, finally realize no one has updated their statuses in the 20 minutes I've stared at the screen, go back to bed and start all over. Sigh.

Today marks the end of my first week of babysitting. She's such a sweet little thing. I asked my youngest son if he thought having her around was ok...and just then she exploded in her diaper so we got a good laugh out of that! I think my youngest daughter was happier this week playing with the baby than she has been in awhile. Maybe because she had something to do besides facebook. It's kind of lonely in this town for homeschool kids. Most of the other kids are involved in sports and really don't have time for those who aren't, which would be...my kids. There aren't any other homeschooled kids their age here either. Funny thing is, I was homeschooled and lonely and said I'd never homeschool my kids. And here I am. Homeschooling. With lonely kids. Sometimes I wonder if I'm doing the right thing. Will they look back on these years and resent me? I try to give them plenty of opportunities to see places and do things, but is it enough? I'll be honest, I just don't know.

Wow, rather melodramatic tonight! Must be the lack of sleep!

Little fingers and toes are in the house!

Here I am, blogging late at night again since I can't sleep. I should change my blog name to "The Midnight Blogger" or something.

We started babysitting this week. I've been excited about it ever since this beautiful little girl was born, but when she actually came this week, I was--no exaggeration--ecstatic. Little fingers and toes in the house again! A tiny sweet-smelling head! All the funny faces and sounds that only such a wee one can make. It was hard the first day to do anything but sit and watch her and hold her. I'm thinking being a grandma will be awesome! I'm also thinking that's a few years down the road so I'll settle for borrowing babies for now... I think my youngest daughter has fallen for those little fingers and toes too. She's going to be a great mom some day.

I still remember the day I dropped Oldest Daughter off my first day back at work. Leaving her was awful. I felt like she would change so much in just the short time I would be gone, and I would miss it. And so, when this new little one's mommy said a very tearful good-bye that first day back to work, I knew how hard it was and felt so bad for her...

My little one is all grown up now into a beautiful, confident college student. But...leaving her at college was awful. I felt like she would change so much in just the short time she would be gone, and I would miss it...hm, I guess some things never change! My kids don't understand these wacky maternal feelings of mine, but someday hopefully they'll have their own wee ones, and then, I'm just guessing, they'll finally get it!

Good night everyone!

Oh, the weather outside is...awesome!

This has been a great weekend so far! There are several pastors and their families in this area that are like-minded and we really enjoy being together. So yesterday the wives went out for lunch at this new little coffee shop here in town. I had the prime rib sandwich which was totally amazing (the sandwich, not the fact that I had one), and the company was great. We just sat and visited for 2 1/2 hours about kids, books, schools, our lives, Bible studies...there was no gossiping, no cutting anyone down...it was good to be with a godly group of women!

Then last night the family and I went to the first football game of the season. We have never really had much of a team, our school just doesn't have enough big guys compared to a lot of other schools...I suppose it's good that our guys are thin, but it doesn't do much for town morale! Anyway, this year the school switched to 8-man instead of 11-man, and we actually won the first game! Woohoo! Personally I'm not really into football, but I enjoyed it! Perfect weather, our guys actually scoring...it was a good evening.

And this evening was the annual Harlan/Portis picnic, put on by several churches in the area. The pastors and wives were out in force and I really enjoyed visiting with everyone again. Two days in a row, wow, some kind of record! I also enjoyed visiting with people from the different communities since I don't see some of them much. Again, the weather was absolutely gorgeous and I was sorry to see the evening come to an end. Funny what a difference friends make...I used to be so shy that I dreaded going to anything. I would just sit like a bump on a log and not really enjoy myself. I'm thankful times have changed! Or maybe the change has just been in me!

Have a great weekend everyone!

Duck Duck Moose

So...today was a normal day. Which is exciting because sometimes I go weeks without one of those! We had school (around the dining room table in case you wondered) and for the most part it was calm. Youngest son tends to make a lot of monkey noises while he studies which I suppose is better than other noises he could be making so I won't complain. Much. While the 3 still-at-home kids were working diligently (well, that may be a slight exaggeration), I worked on flyers for our new Pioneer Club year and actually got quite a few done. The rest of the day just kind of flew by. We went to the library, Dollar General, the post office...all very exciting places but not worthy of an in-depth homeschool field trip since we've already been there, done that.

This evening I decided that since it will soon be Fall and time to take the pool down, I was going to go for a swim. We don't have a big pool so going for a swim isn't as exciting as it sounds, but still, it's water and it's deep enough to float around in so it's all good. Actually I've discovered that I can float in pretty much any depth. What I don't seem to be able to do is sink...I don't think I want to know why. Surely it doesn't have anything to do with the Cosmic Brownies I've been eating... Anyway, I was enjoying the slightly chilly water...until my two youngest got in and decided we should play Duck Duck Moose. No, that isn't a typo. I'm guessing Youngest Daughter made this up, it sounds like her. It was a cross between tag and Duck Duck Goose and, you guessed it, if you were it you had to pretend your hands were antlers and make bellowing sounds while trying to tag someone. Which really wasn't hard considering it's not that big a pool. After awhile I got into the spirit of things and proceeded to try to drown the two of them in an effort to tag them. It was actually quite fun. Next time you're bored, remember...Duck Duck Moose! You're it!

A beautiful day

It's a beeeeeeeeautiful day in the neighborhood! It has gone from being in the 100's to being in the 80's and I am LOVING it!! Nights have been in the 50's which is awesome sleeping weather. After running the AC all summer night and day, this is a wonderful switch.

My garden isn't quite as happy with these cool evenings. Things have kind of sloooooowed to a stop. Oh well, once we start school, I don't have much time to spend in the garden anyways, so it's not all bad. My little veggie stand didn't do quite as well this year as it did last year, but the teller at the bank yesterday said she's heard that from a lot of people, that their gardens didn't do as well. Only in a small town do you go to the bank to get the village garden report!!

We continue to miss Oldest Daughter, but she is having a blast at college, so we're happy for her. We're also happy for her because her boyfriend is going through her town to see her on his way to HIS college. But we get to see him first as he is coming over tonight after he gets off work. I really like that boy! Apparently they are celebrating their '3rd monthiversary' today. I need to get a package together to send to Oldest Daughter, she needs lots of supplies for her art classes! I'm thinking as much as you have to pay for an education these days, they could throw in some colored pencils! Oh well...

Did I mention my baby sister had her third little girl yesterday? That makes 14 grandkids for my mom, 7 boys and 7 girls! So, congratulations, Anna! I bet she's a little dolly! Wish I could see her!

Have a good day all!

15 years in the middle of nowhere

We are coming up on the 15th anniversary of my husband taking the church here. That is hard to believe! 15 years in the middle of nowhere Kansas!

When we first moved here, we lived way out in the country. It was such a peaceful place, so different from the big city of Wichita. I loved it! We had a 3 year-old, a sixteen-month old, and one on the way, so I needed a little peace in my life. No one was in school yet, so we spent our days playing and pretending. The double seater on the swing was our vehicle to many places (while singing Barney songs), and a big hollow log was our boat, spaceship, you name it. We still have that log, it has moved with us 3 times. It's falling apart, but I have a hard time parting with this old friend of ours. I do tend to get attached to strange things...

We had a landlord named Bo, not Little Bo Peep mind you, but Bo the Farmer, although for all I know they might be related. He was (and is) a great guy, except when he'd come into the kitchen early in the morning to get water to mix a calf bottle and scare the daylights out of me. There was another time he wasn't such a great guy. There was this stump you could see from the kitchen window, and if you squinted just right, it looked like the Statue of Liberty! I loved showing it to visitors, although for some reason most of them had a hard time squinting just right. Bad eyesight or something... Anyway, one day I looked out the kitchen window and...GASP! My statue of liberty was gone! Apparently Bo the Farmer thought it was a nuisance so he hooked a chain to it and pulled it out of the ground! Totally ruined the place for me. Can you imagine getting rid of a national monument like that?? After that there was nothing left to do but move. Ok, we did move, but only because Bo the Farmer found himself needing a place to live. Otherwise I might have put up with the change of scenery a bit longer.

So, back to the present...here we are, 15 years in this place God put us in, and I still love it. I love the church people, I love the small town-ness (is that even a word?), I love the wheatfields at harvest time, I love how people know your name. I'll be honest, I didn't want to move here in the beginning because I thought I'd make a rotten pastor's wife (after all, I don't even play the piano!!), but thankfully God didn't listen to my reasonings and knew what I needed. And for that I will always be thankful!

How should I behave?

Two blogs in one day...I must be bored...

Actually the reason for this blog is because I'm confused. I'm now the mother of a college freshman. I've never been that before. I've been the daughter of one, the sister of one, the aunt of one, the...well, you get the picture! So my question is - how am I supposed to behave? What is considered acceptable? I know what I'm NOT supposed to do - things like showing up on her campus wearing Minnie Mouse ears and yelling "MY BABY, MY BABY." But what CAN I do? Will I be annoying Oldest Daughter if I call her? Should I just text her once a month? Should I only contact her if she receives a letter that she won the sweepstakes? Is it ok to ask her how her day went or if she is getting any sleep? I want to let her grow up, I want to give her freedom (ok, I'm just lying on both those, but I'M TRYING so that should count for something, right?). I want her to know I miss her. But I don't want to smother her (you notice the word mother is in smother...). Sigh. The things parenting books don't tell you!

I came back from vacation to a bazillion tomatoes and peppers. Well, maybe not quite that many, but a lot. Peppers don't seem to sell and I've already frozen enough for a year so I'm not sure what to do with the rest...is there such a thing as green pepper jelly? Green pepper cake? Green pepper chocolate? Hey, I could make millions off that! I shall have to do some research on this!

Today is our first day of school. Already there is one little boy with a stinky little attitude. Aaargh! Time for an attitude adjustment!! Because otherwise it is going to be a very long year for both of us! Today is also the first day they go to band at the public school. Not the first day ever, but for this year.

I miss my oldest terribly. Not only is there an empty place at the table, an empty place in school, an empty place on the pew at church, but there is an empty place in my heart. I've never seen a parenting book that told you when your children leave, a big gaping hole is left. However, let's look at this positively...there will be no more confusion about whose socks and underwear I'm sorting! There, I knew there was a bright side to this! And less laundry because Oldest Daughter likes to wear layers and change frequently...Hm, things are looking up already...On the downside, I have to do the ironing now until I get the other kids trained. Maybe I'll just teach them all at once and when the laundry is done, just have everyone line up for their turn at the ironing board. Sounds like a plan to me! And while I'm at it, they can make my bed and clean the house and I shall sit around eating bonbons and reading. Yep, I'm good with that! Oh Darling Kids, I have some new chores for you...

Our amazing/depressing vacation...

So...we left on vacation/dropping off oldest daughter at college and spent a couple of good days in KC with SIL and BIL. Science City was...well, not quite what I expected! It was good, just not really for teenagers. 12 and under would be a good age for it. Out of my 4 kids, only one is that age! But the others survived. Brave 2nd daughter rode the SkyBike, I thought she was incredibly courageous!

On to Branson to Silver Dollar City...only we discovered on Sunday morning that Silver Dollar City was closed this week - and this week only - until Friday. And we had to leave Wednesday morning. And Silver Dollar City was the whole reason we went to Branson. They were, however, open Sunday afternoon...and had some friends of ours known we wanted to go, they could have gotten us in free for the day. I should explain that with six of us on a small town pastor's salary the only way we were even going to SDC is because someone else could get us discounted tickets during the week...so we were all a tiny bit (ok, make that a whole lot!) disappointed. And with no idea of what to do in Branson. Because everything costs a million dollars when you have four kids who no longer qualify for children's rates. There were a couple of shows we thought we were going to get to see, but those fell through too or were sold out!

BUT....we usually find some fun and this time was no exception! We went swimming in Table Rock Lake (seriously warm water), went on Ride the Ducks (thanks to the above mentioned friends who found complimentary tickets for us!), walked around in Branson's Landing and saw a neat, albeit short, water show, bowled at Hillbilly Bowling (yee haw!), rode the trolley around the Landing, went to Ripley's Believe it or Not. Tuesday we also went to the Titanic Museum because they have a great deal on a family pass. Unfortunately some of us came out of there extremely depressed. Especially me because I have this weird imagination where I get so into things that I could feel the people's terror and sadness. Plus my person (they give you a bio at the beginning of the tour) died. Sad day. So that may not have been the best thing to go to. The day got better though when we went out in a pontoon boat on Table Rock Lake and had a great time. The pseudo-daughter I've mentioned in other blogs came out for the afternoon, so that was awesome. And that evening some friends came and we went out again. I wondered what we would do out on the lake for several hours, but the day just flew by. It was great!

Then came Wednesday...the day we had to pack up and leave our oldest baby at college. Everyone was tired and sad and oldest daugher was nervous and cranky! Especially when I didn't let her drive her own car on the windy roads... We cleaned the house we were renting and headed out. If you've never left your daughter at college, well, let's just say it's a hard thing for sure! I did pretty good, until we got home a couple of days later and I walked in the house and started bawling and couldn't stop. One day later I'm down to sniffling so I'm making progress. Anyway, back to Wednesday...no, that was a depressing day, so let's move to Thursday! We left the college town and headed for Wichita to see my husband's family (the ones that don't live in KC). It is always fun to be with them, and we had some great food at my SIL's house there. My youngest son got to spend the night with his cousin so he was happy.

Friday, we headed home, and I think everybody was depressed about leaving oldest daughter, so we were glad to stop for lunch with some friends and spend a couple of hours laughing.

So...I guess you could say it was the best of times and it was the worst of times. We didn't get to do the things we planned, but we did get to spend lots of time with friends and family! So, no complaints...except that I miss my baby. But she's happy and having fun, so it's good!

Ok, I'm done rambling! Have a good weekend!

On our way

So, we are on our way to dropping off oldest child, but first, a little vacation! We left home yesterday right before noon and are now in Olathe, KS to spend a couple of days at my brother-in-law's house. Last night we just hung out and ate spaghetti and brownies (yum); today we are going to go to Science City at Union Station in Kansas City and then go visit some friends for the evening. Should be a good day since we'll be INSIDE out of the heat for the most part!! I'm just hoping all the stuff in my daughter's car doesn't melt or explode in the heat since it will be in there for a week!!

They drive me nuts...but I'd be lost without them!

Sometimes my family drives me insane. Literally. Not because they are misbehaving, but because they are behaving strangely. Very strangely. Tonight for instance. I foolishly thought that with the oldest leaving soon, we should have a game night. Like most families, we have learned what games NOT to play. Apples to Apples is enjoyed by the kids...but NOT the parents. Phase Ten reduces everyone to whining. We thought Skipbo and Yatzee would be safe, and if someone hadn't put 'Oh Brother, Where Art Thou' music on, it might have been. Instead it seemed like whoever's turn it was had to be up doing some hillbilly jig...or breakdancing (how you can breakdance to THAT music is beyond me, but they manage). Sigh. The noise volume just kept getting louder and louder until I was afraid the police would show up to see what kind of wild animals we keep in our house. Then my oldest added ringtones to it. Or maybe the ringtones started it all. I of course sat there quietly, at least until I got a Yatzee on my very last turn. I may have screamed a bit at that one since I never get a yatzee. Not that anyone heard over all the noise.

So...they drive me crazy. But when they are gone, the silence is deafening. No armpit noises, no loud music, no foot-stomping and toe-tapping, no giggles, no laughter.

Maybe sanity is over-rated?

Goodbye, farewell, auf wiedersehen, adieu

Most nights I wander around the house wondering how other people (namely my husband) can simply lie down (or is it lay down? Hm, should I really be homeschooling if I can't remember the difference? Then again, it is midnight) and fall asleep. It is a mystery to me. I am an insomniac. So I either drive myself crazy trying to fall asleep or I wander around. And if I'm going to wander around, I might as well be productive. My family probably wouldn't appreciate me vacuuming at midnight, so I will blog instead. This is me, blogging...and rambling...and wishing I was asleep...

We had a farewell party for my oldest baby tonight. She is heading off to college this week. It blows my mind that we have arrived at this point so soon. Wasn't it just yesterday that she was born, a big 10 1/2 pound baby, purple in the face? Wasn't it just yesterday she had to have her stuffed Barney in order to sleep? Wasn't it just yesterday she was heading off to preschool, heading off to camp, heading off to her first job? Wow. I am amazed when I look at her. I never imagined when she was little that this day would come so soon. But I also never imagined that she would grow up so beautiful, so confident, so hard-working, such a wonderful blessing almost every day of her life (you notice I said ALMOST--she's had her moments haha). She heads off to college with a poise that is still lacking in my own life. What can I say...I am proud as punch of her, of all my kids. I'm so thankful to God for them, but most of the time the words don't come to tell them so. Unless it's midnight...

This week marks a new chapter in our lives, a new beginning. We will load up her mountain of stuff, haul it all to college for her (taking a little vacation along the way), kiss her goodbye...and more than likely cry most of the way home. But this is the way it should be. You love them, you train them, you give them to God, you send them out the door. But you always leave that door open a smidge so they can visit when they feel the need.

I love you my oldest baby! I will miss you every day. I'm ever so proud to be your Mom :) Fare thee well my child!

Ok, time to go try and sleep again!

Under the Kansan sky

What an absolutely beautiful day! It has been so incredibly hot here, that 87 feels like a nice balmy day. I've been sitting outside snapping beans, waxing eloquently (as my dad liked to say) in my mind so I thought I'd bring the laptop out and do some writing. The sky is so blue with huge puffy clouds...a perfect day for being lazy outdoors. Why is it I have to kick my kids outside to get them to go out? I would much sooner be out here than inside. I threaten them with work if they don't go for a walk! What ever happened to kids spending the summer outdoors, only coming in for a meal once in a while? I don't remember ever being bored in the summer, but my kids are, even with all the electronics at their fingertips. I think their imaginations are bored from lack of use. So now they are outside...somewhere...and so am I. If I had a hammock the day would be perfect. Unfortunately the last time I brought a hammock home it lasted about two weeks because the kids thought it was so much fun to pile it in and swing like crazy!

So, a little about my family...We moved here to the middle of nowhere almost 15 years ago so my husband could take a small church. When we first arrived we lived on a farm 14 miles from town. After living in a big city, it seemed like paradise! We had a 3 year old and a 20 month old, and I was ready for room for them to play. It was so incredibly peaceful out there. Well, except for when our dogs kept getting run over--that sort of disturbed MY peace anyway! A few years later, now with 3 children, we moved to a farm 4 miles from town to a house that had beautiful kitchen cabinets...and holes in the kitchen floor! And the quarter mile from the county road to our house was like a big slipperslide if it rained at all! We'd stop, make sure everybody was buckled up well, say a pray we'd make it, then slide all over until we got to the house! But we loved being in the country! Sadly the condition of the house finally led us to move into town, this time to a major fixer-upper. We spent a few months working on it, then, with 4 kids now, made it our home for a few years. Living in town was a big change, even in a small town. I was afraid my kids would make too much noise and the neighbors would complain! I quickly learned they were no noisier than any other kid. But I sure missed the peace and quiet of the countryside!

About 7 years ago, we finally bought a house. We could have bought the fixer-upper but decided we didn't want to spend the rest of our lives patching cracks. The house we bought was not my dream house although my husband really liked it, but the yard definitely was! A very large back yard for the kids to play in, space to put in a small pond or two, and a separate garden area where I could plant to my heart's content! And...it was NOT a fixer upper. Sure, we've done stuff to it, added a couple of bedrooms in the basement as the kids got older, but we haven't been sitting around staring at hundreds of cracks in the walls! So, if God leaves us here in the middle of nowhere, this is a good place to be!

I'll write more about us another day! Now I'll take a little nap in my comfy chair!

The Wedding of my 'other daughter'

My lands, it is H-O-T here! The heat index is 112!! So, I took the kids and a friend to Glen Elder Lake where the water was refreshingly cool and we had a great time. My oldest daughter got really sunburnt last time, so hopefully this time slathering on sunscreen for 10 minutes did the trick. We'll see. If she looks like a tomato tomorrow I'm going to suggest she stay out of the sun. For good!

I feel sorry for my poor garden out there in this heat. Okra would do fine...only I didn't plant any, so that's irrelevant I guess! Cucumber vines look totally wilted! And that's the garden update for today...I think I should go give the poor things some water.

Well, my 'other daughter' is married now! It was a beautiful wedding--NOT a huge, fancy wedding, but beautiful in it's simplicity. It was definitely centered around the Bride, the Groom, and God. Which is exactly as it should be. Here's a lovely picture of them and MY handsome groom and me:

That's me in the red, not the white...in case you were confused :)

My other daughter

I'm going to a wedding this weekend, the wedding of my 'other daughter.' She's not my flesh and blood, she's not an adopted daughter; she's a daughter of my heart, my other daughter.

I first met this other daughter of mine when she was a little pixie of 8 years old. My husband took the church here in our little town, and her family faithfully came every Sunday. She wound herself around my heart, a little more with each passing year. I watched her grow into a teenager and watched her go through things that would be hard on anyone, much less a teen: her parents divorced, her sister and nephew were in a terrible accident that left her sister with a brain injury and her beloved nephew just a sweet memory that we still shed tears over. Many teens would have rebelled against God and their parents, but not my other daughter. She moved away with her mom for a short time, then came back to live with her dad, taught Sunday school for us, remained faithful to God. She spent many days at our house, and that was just fine with me. I watched her grow into an older teenager, watched her graduate from high school with honors. I mourned when she left for college, loved it when she came home for holidays. During the summer she was at our table for many meals because her dad is a farmer who works long hours and her step-mom is our town doctor who also works long hours. That was fine with me. It was always a joy to set another place, to be able to spend a little more time with her. The first summer she didn't come home, except for a short visit, was hard. I missed her at our table. But she was growing up, spreading her wings, which is as it should be.

And now, my other daughter is all grown up. We watched her walk down the aisle to graduate from college this spring, again with honors. We were incredibly proud. And we will be incredibly proud this weekend when we watch her walk down the aisle to marry a fine Christian man. My husband will marry them, one son will play the piano for them, one daughter will be a candle lighter...I will be the 'other mom,' proud as can be of this 'other daughter' that holds such a special place in my heart.

I love you, my other daugher...

My garden

one of my little ponds

It was incredibly muggy here in the middle of nowhere Kansas, but it was beautiful in my garden! The butterflies just keep multiplying...unfortunately so do the Japanese beetles. I picked tomatoes and cucumbers, but later had fewer than I remembered picking. Turns out I had taken two bags out, put them in two bags, then left one sitting out in the garden. Glad I found them before the bugs did! My family thinks it strange that I love my garden so much. Is it strange that I'd rather get a truckload of manure or grass clippings than a vase of flowers? I'm going to try and post some more garden pictures on here. Once I figure out how to do it... The first one was a fluke or something!

The Beauty of a Newborn

I love babies. When you hold one, all becomes right in the world. Stress...what is that? Breathe in that baby smell (ok, one with a clean diaper, otherwise that totally changes things!), and you become almost intoxicated with joy. Today I got to hold a newborn. She is beautiful with a headful of black hair. She's not mine, but that didn't stop me from thoroughly enjoying her. Listening to her little squeaks, watching her stretch, seeing those little tiny wondering eyes...it just doesn't get better than that! Her whole future lies before her...and she doesn't even know it, doesn't even care. Such innocence.

Ok, apparently holding a newborn brings out the really bad poet in me! I looked at this wee one and thought about my oldest baby. She is getting ready to head off for college, her whole future lies before her, she will also be stretching and wondering...and wandering. The years have flown by!

So, where am I going with this? I really have no idea! Just musing I suppose, haha! I know, you thought I was going to be wise and eloquent. Sorry to disappoint you, it's too late at night!

It's been a very busy week, not stressful, just very busy. The garden is still producing, so that makes me happy. Lots of tomatoes, a few cucumbers, broccoli. The Japanese Beetles are driving me crazy, they like to buzz all around my head when I'm outside! I hate those things! Nasty nasty!

Ok, enough rambling for one night! I'm still trying to decide what direction this blog will take, so be patient with me. Good night!!

The Decomposing Mr. Dinsmore

So I thought I'd tell you about some places we went last week. Being a homeschool mom, I'm always on the lookout for a field trip, so when two of my kids needed to go to Phillipsburg (Kansas of course) to the DMV there (we don't have one in our town so we have to travel an hour), I got out my handy-dandy Kansas tourism guide to see what was in the area. After all, I've only lived here in this town for 15 years so I cannot possibly be expected to know what all there is... I should mention that I LOVE tourism guides! Everywhere I go I pick up guides, pamphlets, you name it! You just never know when you are going to find something totally cool to see. Or just plain strange.

Anyway, did you know that Phillipsburg has a museum called Fort Bissell? I've been to this town many times, but apparently have never made it to the west side or I would have seen this museum. It's a stockade with several buildings in it (they have been moved from other places) like 2 log cabins, an old schoolhouse, a train depot and...I don't remember what else. It was probably a very interesting place, but it was 102 degrees that day and the buildings are NOT air conditioned. So we will have to go back sometime when we won't melt looking at the displays.

After leaving Phillipsburgs we headed toward Smith Center because 9 miles from there is...are you ready?...the ACTUAL cabin where Home, Home on the Range was written. Still in its original location on the banks of Beaver Creek. Of course its original location is now someone's backyard, but they've done a good job of preserving it. One of the things inside the cabin is a chair with a sign that reads 'Oldest Chair in Kansas'. I'm not sure if that can be proved or not, so I'll just trust them on that one. I was trying to get my kids to use their imagination and picture Dr. Brewster Higley sitting on his porch looking out at the deer and the antelope playing, but they are boring teenagers who have lost their imaginations and just had to point out to me that there is no porch. Sigh. We weren't there very long.

Then later in the week we had a missionary family come for the weekend. Did I mention my husband is a pastor in a small town? Thus the missionary family. Anyway, Missionary Wife also loves quirky places so of course we had to take them to see THE Big Ball of Twine in Cawker City. Now, in case you are wondering why that is exciting...it is REALLY big. Not just big but BIG! Plus the town's people have made replicas of famous paintings (not all that good but that's beside the point) and put balls of twine in every single one. You've never seen the Mona Lisa portrayed this way before. Or the Statue of Liberty holding a ball of twine instead of a torch. Or... So you follow a ball of twine (it's painted on the sidewalk) up and down Main Street and look at all the pictures. You can even buy Ball of Twine salt and pepper shakers at the little Ball of Twine Souvenir Shop. Be sure and stay at the Ball of Twine Inn. There is no Ball of Twine Restaurant though, so bring a sandwich or something. Did I mention the Twine-a-thon in August? Quirkiness rating = pretty high

Then it was on to The Garden of Eden in Lucas. If you've never visited this place, words cannot even begin to describe it. Well, maybe several words. Old man with a strange passion for making bizarre statues out of cement, starting, of course, with Adam and Eve. Thus the name. Not only do you get to tour Mr. Dinsmore's house and garden (the statues are all outside), but you get to see his decomposing body in a mausoleum he built for himself. Last time we were there, they told us the air-tight box had sprung a leak which was why he was decomposing...and apparently once it started it really happened quickly! Definitely high on the list of Strange Things to See in Kansas! I'm sure our company never thought Kansas would be this exciting!

Confessions of a new blogger

Ok, here goes - my very first blog. I feel so modern! And scared. What if no one reads my blog? what if someone does?? I've been known to act like an idiot in public, but this is WAY public... Hm, maybe I should have called this 'The Neurotic Kansan'...

Oh yes, my confessions...

Confession #1 I'm not a native Kansan. BUT in my defense, I have lived in this state over half my life, and since before that I was a missionary kid without a real home, I will claim Kansas and be proud of it.

Confession #2 Sometimes my family thinks I'm a wee bit insane. Like last year when a garden spider came to live in my garden (good place for a garden spider) and I spent the summer taking pictures of her life cycle. She made two gigantic egg sacs and I kept them in a jar to see if they would hatch--NO, not inside like my husband assumed when I told him this spring that hundreds of babies had hatched. Did I mention the spider's name? Webster. What a great name. I'd like to take credit for it, but that actually goes to my daughter Sarah. She's much more creative at names than I am. For example, she has a fat stuffed frog and a skinny stuffed frog and she named them Fattio and Skinnyet. Hm, maybe I'm not the insane one here...If I ever figure out how to post pictures, I'll put some of Webster on here. I know, you'll be sure to look for them.

Confession #3 I have a wild imagination. And a slight tendency to exaggerate. With my wild imagination I should be creative, but there seems to be a short circuit between my brain and my hands, so things get lost along the way. That's why my scrapbooking looks like something a two year old might do.

Confession #4 I love quirky things, in fact, the quirkier the better. Fortunately, Kansas is full of quirkiness. Unfortunately, my family doesn't share this love of mine. They prefer to drive past signs that tell you some famous person once broke a nail at this spot. Where's the fun in that?

Confession #5 I think I've run out of confessions...at least for today.